December 9, 2010

cure me


i want to shoot color film again. my camera has been sitting empty without film in my locker for a week now since my last assignment and since it doesn't look like i'll be doing the photo essay till vacation, i'm going to load it with some color film tomorrow. my harikin has been loaded with color film since summer, i'm up to the eighteenth frame i think. i carry it around in a special pocket in my bag but it sucks that i can't use it a lot because it must be sunny and my subject must be 3m- away. so it's basically a little diary i carry around and use whenever i remember while i watch beautiful light; like my little moleskine journal.. it just sits at the bottom of my bag.

today, i missed the bus. i know i did because i miss it everyday. so i went to the pharmacy and got things i didn't really need, hoping that once i leave the store the bus will show up. yeah, it didn't. i put my hoods (hoods, plural, i wore two) and my plush knit gloves, turned on my pandora and stomped the ten blocks home. five at night here looks like nine at night. today it was seventeen degrees so i jaywalked a lot just to keep my knees circulating with blood. i had ldn by lily allen playing and it made me feel a little better about missing the bus (which came when i got to my stop. two buses actually) and kind of sang out loud in the cold in the dark. this is how you cure your freezing city walk home from the subway station. my pen and ink teacher told us of someone who got killed for being "plugged in". she means having earphones on and loud music playing. of course i am aware that if i play my music so incredibly loud because it fits my mood, i can get mugged, kidnapped, fall into a manhole, or in his case, get hit by a truck backing up. i don't play my music at this high volume, it's discomforting to my ear drums. i listen loud enough to hear babies cry but enough to drown them out so my beats play better noise.

i guess i can mark this day as the final day of being sick. i woke up this morning lying in bed without hacking like every morning before so i assumed that i was cured. after brushing my teeth and washing my face, i automatically had a cough attack. i felt better though, i definitely didn't feel things trying to slug up my throat. so i think i'll post about what happened last thursday to tuesday in the previous post. i gotta go edit it now bai