December 31, 2011


Listening to some Michelle Branch right now. She used to be one of my favorite singers in the 2000s. I remember winning Platinum on Karaoke Revolution on "All You Wanted". I won't ever forget that because it was my friend's birthday party and I remember going to the bathroom and discovering that they had a landline phone in there. Lol.

So this mini project I gave myself last night is finally done! I was just sparked with inspiration after visiting Maria's stream again and realized I had so much free time (even though it was 11 at night). I went through extras of enlarged color negative prints from my color film class and pulled this one out. I didn't know what to do with it, I just let my hands and mind work. I watched The Adventures of TinTin during the process, multitasking between my fingers and ears. What sucks is that I already submitted three portfolios already, 2 that are really important, and then I create this. Nice. I'm just glad I finished the NYU application, the Tisch portfolio, all my AP homework, visited the Met for a report due next week, completed my Senior Art Show application, and still manage time to treat myself shopping, share some love with Lux, watch new movies, and finally update my iPod. Today, I helped my cousins move out and then cleaned the whole damn kitchen, every single bowl and plate. My back acted up a bitch but I felt like I needed to do the cleaning in time for the new year.

Speaking of the new year, I'm gonna be spending my last hours of the year at home as usual with the fam watching Dick Clark in Times Square on tv. Next year.. it will, it has to, be the year I finally see that frickin ball drop with my own eyes. I have to go at one point in my life, disappointing actually that I live here and have never gone.

2011 has been the most hard-working year for me so far. If I were to name one year where everything changed, it was this year. There were tough times and good times, all making me who I am today. I am a much more experienced person now than before and I have made better and new friendships this year as well. Too many things have happened, some all in one day, and I'm so glad that I was able to be a part of them. 2011 was good to me, a little bitch sometimes, but thank you for being a challenging one too. There's already so much I'm looking forward to, like turning 18 soon and having a lot more time to take photos after all these college apps! Can't fucking wait!

Thanks to everyone who still reads these entries, the people on my stats, fans, followers, contacts, thanks so much for the support, comments, and messages I've received all year. You've all been great! See you all in the new year :)

December 28, 2011

video games

♫ by Silver Swans

I can't stop listening to this cover. It's so dreamy and creepy and reminds me so much of Twin Peaks and those scenes where Julee Cruise sings at the hangout. You should check it out. Both the song and the series.

I hope whoever is reading this had a nice holiday. Mine was fairly swell. Instead of making my traditional fondant cupcakes for Christmas, I tried totally new recipes for cake pops and sugar cookies. For the cake pops, I used a recipe by Bakerella and made mine out of yellow cake, vanilla frosting, bittersweet chocolate, and peppermint. I tried the stained-glass thing with the cookies and they came out cute! Unfortunately, taking photos of them had slipped my mind because I was so exhausted (it was a Thursday night). I also made rainbow jello for the Christmas party we host at our house. The kids loved it! I don't like to eat what I make so I'm glad people enjoyed my goodies.

Our lights are still up for New Years and that means holiday shopping hasn't ended either. I'm supposed to be getting new frames this week. I hope! I can't wait to see them again, they're Praaada. That's the gift from my mom. Along with a new fur-hooded coat which makes me look like a bear and I have no issue with that. My dad got me a Starbucks gift card, which I have been using religiously, and a new Kitchen-Aid Hand Mixer, which will save me a lot of unnecessary dominant arm workout. What did I get myself? I don't even know if anything I got should count as Christmas gifts, I just feel like I deserve them after all this application work and good grades in school. I ordered myself a pair of Levi's (which I am so infatuated with) and Dolce Vita Jemmas (fiiinnally [insert Emma Stone's Easy A face]). Okay the jeans were from Zappos and I feel I need to tell yall that Zappos is so FAST on delivery. My package came about 13 hours after I placed it. What?! Bananas. Well yeah, it was one-day delivery but STILL.. Zappos offered it and it was free. Jussayin. My shoes haven't come yet but I'm super excited because I've been holding them off for a few months.

On a reality note.. I do really need to continue my NYU application. It is so freaking long and excessive but then again it's NYU. I'm not going to get in but whatever, I have nothing to lose except vacation time that I could be spending with my cute little kitty. See yall in the new year!

♫ Municipality by Real Estate

December 17, 2011


Listening to Tinie Tempah's album. Lux is sleeping next to me on the chair. I'm her human heater. I forgot what day it was every day this week. My back and neck has been killing me the past week or so. I'm going to have such bad posture as a result of carrying too much shit to school, never sleeping, and napping on the window on the subway. I wish I could take yoga again. The school should really offer it, there isn't any equipment except a mat and you sweat more than in regular phys ed. You get shit done and nothing will hurt as opposed to volleyball where I have to use my dominant arm all the time (also a reason why my upper body aches so much).

People have already gotten accepted into ivy leagues this week. I'm very proud of my peers. I wish I had done early action so I don't have to deal with the rest of the schools due in the next few months... but I didn't... because I'm lazy. That's not true. The reason why it took me more than a week to write my college essay was because school kept getting in the way. Honestly, they should really cut a lot of slack for seniors. It's such a waste of time.. traveling to school and back is a total of about 3 hours. I'll stop complaining.

Has anyone been watching American Horror Story? The besssst. I watch all my shows a few days after they air now. I don't even remember the last time I watched tv on a tv. I'm just so tired.. can't be bothered. I want to be in college already. I hate school. Baby Lux here is keeping me sane.

December 10, 2011


Been busy.. ever since I adopted A CAT. She's so precious. The baby's name is Lux and she's only 6 months! I've been early to school ever since I got her. She wakes me up at exactly 5:30 every morning. Crazy annoying when it's not a school day but I still love her.

Another highlight of the week is my package from Solestruck. They gave me one of Messeca's velvet holiday shoes and I looove them. Can't wait to wear them for Christmas! I can't wear them now because volleyball has taken over my life. Just kidding. Like 1/16 of my life. But I'm very much near spraining all my joints right now. My ankle especially makes it difficult to walk and carrying large loads make my wrist hurt.

Lux is kneading. She's so cute.. ready for bedtime. She'll wake in like 5 hours and sit on my face.

November 24, 2011

happy thanks!

I've been so behind on the internet lately ever since reality hit me in the face. Some of my college apps are due in less than a week and it's killing meee. I also hadn't taken any pictures in over a month because of school which was a muy big problemo. I took the opportunity the recent Tuesday to get back on track with my portfolio. I will try to shoot every week now. I also realized I've pretty much given up on the 52weeks project. Whatevs, I really didn't have the time.

I'll just be mooching and cooking and baking tonight and then hopefully get a little shopping done tomorrow. I haven't gone shopping in over a month either! How I survived, I do not know. Time is going by so fast I'm actually really scared.. scared until my three early apps are done.

I just wanted to make this post to revive my dead spirit on the internet. I have to go make mashed potatoes now. (First time!) Happy holidays.

November 9, 2011

i'm beginning my holiday wishlist

Is it too early? No. As a matter of fact, I'm going to hunt for these items tomorrow and see if I really like them. I've been dying over velvet and the only wearable velvet piece I have is this dark navy t-shirt my mom made at my age that fits almost like a crop top for me and that isn't my thang. And I've been drooooling over Jemmas. I entered two contests for them.. and lost. They will be mine one day, even when they're out of fashion which doesn't seem very soon.

velvet flippy tunic / topshop
velvet burnout bodycon slip / free people
jemma / dolce vita

I have one application I have to complete before December and it's bustin' my nuts even though I don't know what I'm supposed to do. I'm ready to get it over with but I don't think I'm prepared. I have so little time these days I've even been postponing my homework on my own terms. I just don't care about my classes anymore. All my teachers have senioritis. Things also keep getting in the way of my time with the studio and getting new photo shoots done. I complain about that in every post but I'm really sad about it. I'm excited for the year though, I might be going to California next month.... mad excitessss yo.

Update: Saw both the dresses today. I no longer like the Free People one.. lol and Topshop did not have the dress in my size :( However, Free People launched these new limited edition dresses and oh my awwwwe I want this one:

It's 600 bucks and I don't even like yellow! I own nothing yellow but this is golden ocher and it's sooo beautiful how the designer uses leather with layers and tulle. I am also not a fan of tulle so this is a huge deal. I would really love for this to be my prom dress.

October 30, 2011

fake blues

♫ by Real Estate

Know what's really nice right now? Hot coffee on a Sunday afternoon. I'm procrastinating as usual but it's just AP homework.. no big deal right? Anyway, I'm glad I was able to get some portfolio-worthy photos these past few days. Actually just from Friday but some fortunate and unfortunate events had come up since. I busted a vein Thursday morning playing volleyball.. going to the doctor Friday morning only made me more embarrassed that I can't play it right. But I've been playing volleyball forevaaa, not competitively, so I get it but nobody over and underhand serves a ball that ultimately feels like a basketball for 30 minutes straight. It was just bound to hit my wrist instead of my palm after all that time.

So it was a half day Friday and we wanted to ice skate! I found out that Citi Pond decided to delay because of Thursday's rain so we had to wait till it opened to the public at 6pm. It was 11:45am when I found out. What the fuck were we going to do for six hours? It was freezing like abnormal fall weather is and like the art majors we are, we went to the NYPL and discovered some awesome stuff at their 100 anniversary exhibition like E.E. Cumming's typewriter and the original copy of George Washington's Farewell Address, which we agreed is a bigger deal than just sitting there behind some plexiglass. Somehow six hours went by quickly and we still ended up being in the first 100 skaters range for free rentals even though most of us had our own. I still can't believe I waited seven hours to get on the ice but it was worth it. We were all tired by the end and Phil learned to skate for the first time.

Saturday it snowed. It's still not Halloween and it snowed a few inches. I hope we don't get outrageous blizzards this winter though. There are too many good things to happen next season, they just can't be ruined. After the SATs this weekend, I can finally start borrowing the school studio for more photo shoots. I haven't had time to commit to it and I just want to get back behind the camera and under the lights again. Mucho exciteddd.

Also, can whoever posts my photos on weheartit stop? And is it also possible for you to not use my photos as your profile pictures without letting me know? Thankssss. I'd like to delete my flickr in the future and just have one portfolio site but I can't now because they'll still be all over the internet and I don't even know if they're credited. Just sayin.

I love these photos so muchhhh. I want to watch a movie but nooo I have to take notes on catacombs and funerary art of the late antiquity period. booooo

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October 24, 2011

two cousins

♫ by Slow Club

In the midst of doing my homework, which I'm saying I'm doing because I'm actually supposed to but I'm really not, I decided to revive my lookbook and snapped some photos for a new look. I secretly check back on that site for inspiration and just.. new places to shop at lol. I've been listening to this Slow Club song a lot this month. I recently saw the video and love it so much, it makes me want to make a slow-mo dancing film. Speaking of loving something so much, I went to the SVA open house this past Saturday and I think our relationship just turned solid. I need to go to that school.. it is the perfect place for me and it has everything and I love everyone inside it. Except the color enlargers that are being discarded later in the year.. but I still get to use it every Saturday! Anyway.. I tried to start a habit of bringing my Minolta with me everywhere but I always end up never taking it out or taking it out at the wrong times like the girl's locker section at the Y... my mom thought it was weird of me. Okay.. well. I actually need to start homework now before my SAT class so.. I'm just gonna leave my look here:

October 16, 2011

let's do the things we normally do

♫ by Dido (errrweird?NO)

I thought I should update since I am virtually dead. I have to actually remind myself to post at least one photo on tumblr and I only go on facebook for my Sim now. Wow I am lame. I don't think I have a 52weeks photo but I will soon one day this year becauuuse I lightened my hair! Twice! It was nice and brown last week but now I tried a new lightening method and it just got too light. I was going for the ombre look.. I think I'll have to tone it again. Whateva at least I can wear as much black as I want now and not look like a black walking stick.

I'm supaaa busy but I'm also a terrible procrastinator. Wanna know what I did last night? I probably shouldn't say because I'm ashamed of it but I was up till 4am last night looking through hundreds of pages of shoes. Shoes. Let's not get into that. I missed SNL because of my addiction. Anyway, I need to get my portfolio together again this week. I haven't shot much in like two months and I'm sad about that but I'm actually so busy. Besides procrastinating like a motherfucker, my AP Art History homework takes forevaaaaa.. so now I'm doing my AP Stat homework and it's midnight. I have a bedtime for myself and that was supposed to happen two hours ago. Getting my outfit ready for the next day is going to take another hour. Ughhh this is my life. I'm hungry.

♫ Edge of the Ocean by Ivy
So I have this Coldplay radio on Pandora that I listen to while I do my homework.. it also has Keane, Sia, Feist, Bon Iver, John Mayer and all that sad stuff but it's what I listen to to focus. That should probably explain the strange artists I'm sharing in my posts. Otherwise it's some classical music like the Pride and Prejudice soundtrack. Don't judge me, I am quite fond of my taste. I can't listen to the music I like when I work or I'll get hyper and rather focus on my singing than what I'm reading.

October 10, 2011

Eating cheetos and butterfingers all weekend. Watching African Queen with Humphrey Bogart and Katherine Hepburn. Realized Andrew Camus is a greater philosopher than I thought before. Sorry, Andy, said your book sucked too quick. Gonna resume eating cheetos. Lazy Sunday night.

October 6, 2011

I am having an enlightening moment with myself and college right now. Since 9th period, I've been on the roll with life and schools and the future. I need to make this post to remind myself next time I'm stressed. I'm under control.

October 1, 2011

these stitches are tearing me apart

I recently got my bottom wisdom teeth pulled. My right side hurts more because the tooth wasn't even coming out yet but it was really bothersome so I had to get it out. However since it wasn't on the surface yet, the cut was going to be bigger and I was going to get more stitches. It hurt like a million bitches trying to get inside my gums. I actually cried from so much pain. And even though I had class today, swollen and bruised chipmunk cheeks wasn't going to stop me. They did fucking hurt and ache a hella lot but at least I got work done.

I don't think I'll have a 52weeks photo this week because I'm still trying to recover on top of all the APAH and Psych-Lit homework I have due Monday. But I will definitely be getting my Minolta roll developed by the middle of the week since I've been so hesitant to finish on that.

Today, despite the low 50s mid 60s rainy weather, my stupid block decided to have the block party when fall arrives. It was initially planned for a long five months ago for July before I left but then it was moved again without notice to the day of Hurricane Irene. And then I just found out about this new date literally two days ago. I hate them but you know what... rain don't stop me and especially not this family. We covered our front driveway and made a gigantic fort and proceeded with our deliciously-smelling barbecue even though I couldn't chew anything. So instead I sat in my parka reading Albert Camus' The Stranger. Honestly, I don't see the point of this book. I finished it wondering what the heck the book was even about. It's probably how my proctors feel when they read my SAT essays or something because I make all the shit up so it's not understandable. Plus my medications from the tooth extractions were making me read literally all over the place except word for word; I had experienced dyslexia for the first time.

I can't get anything done because of how irritating these stitches are. I hope they don't worsen by Monday. I would actually like to go to school so I can "learn"the information I need for my upcoming tests.

September 24, 2011

into the fire

♫ by Thirteen Senses

Well this seemed like such a long week considering how much I got done. I took my first test of the school year in AP Stat and wow, it was nothing like the review so I won't be surprised if I end up dropping the class next semester. Autumn has arrived but I was wearing sweaters and boots on the last days of summer because it was colder then. These beginning fall days have just been incredibly humid and disgusting and hot. My writing is growing terrible. I have allergies. What is this post even about.

One day in the middle of this week, my friends and I were talking about animals and pets and sharing stories about them. That night, while my friend was walking home, she found a white blue-eyed rabbit in the park. It had to be a house pet.. this is the city. Even though we live near a nature reserve, what are the chances of finding a pure white rabbit? As the pro-animal aspiring veterinarian she is, she brought it home and is now trying to help the little cloud puff heal a bad wound until she's healthy and ready for new owners. This girl lives in a house with two dogs and two cats, animals I'm used to being around. The rabbit, I was new to, but what a dreamy experience it is. It shits a lot and pissed in her closet but she hops and nibbles on food and most importantly, doesn't make any noiiisssse. Cuteness! My mom won't let me have any furry pets because we already have an animal in the house which is my little brother. He jumps, crawls, cries, yells, talks, and throws things like an animal. Not cute. Just kidding, my lil bro is very kute.

I started my SAT prep classes this week too. Even though it's convenient to have it in school after classes, I still get home SO late! I better have advanced a lot by the end of the course. I also began my SVA class today. I love it so far! It's crazy that people would come out to New York City from Connecticut just for this class every Saturday... that's dedication. I'm proud and not proud to say that I'm the most experienced photography student in the class as far as my teacher knows but sometimes when she asks questions involving science... I won't have any answers for that. One of the important reasons why I'm taking the class is to learn y'know... Anywayyy, I have a crap load of AP Art History homework to do and some self-teaching lessons on the US Government since my teacher is too distracted by his own life than to directly tell us how this damn government works.


♫ Blood Bank by Bon Iver (lots of Bon Iver this week too)
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September 17, 2011

now my feet won't touch the ground

♫ by Coldplay

School started last Thursday. I am totally okay with my schedule because I have friends in each of them. I'm surprised I have never actually changed my schedule the past four years I've been here. Anywayyy I don't have any photos to upload.. I have two APs this year and I begin my photo and SAT prep classes next week. All this college mayhem is getting to me.. I'm beginning to question a lot of things. It is so difficult being a New York City teenager.

I still need to finish the roll on my Minolta before I forget. It's getting cold here now, I don't feel like getting out at all. I don't even remember if I have film in my Canon or Harikin either. I should really check that.. Well I just wanted to make this post to remind you I'm not dead and that I'll be really slow on the internet this year. I have a huge to-do list from now to December. :(

♫ I Will Never See The Sun by Great Lake Swimmers

September 11, 2011

10 years later

I was beginning second grade, probably the second day of school too. I'm sure we were just starting a regular day preparing for elementary school. An announcement to evacuate all classes into the auditorium probably came on before our regular announcements that began with the Pledge of Allegiance and singing the Star-Spangled Banner. Next thing I know, every one is down and out of school. As to most little kids, all that mattered was being dismissed early for no reason. I only lived a block away. I had nothing to do because my afterschool cartoons weren't going to air till much later and I had already ate breakfast. I walked over to my grandma's which was a few houses away and everyone was watching TV or listening to the radio. I wasn't really grasping on anything so I went back outside. The clear cerulean blue sky was covered with a swarm of burnt pieces of paper. I picked up some that landed on the sidewalk wondering how the hell and where the hell these sheets with grids and numbers came from. I kept some in the back of a notebook, which I now don't know where. My house then was in a neighborhood almost at the bottom of Brooklyn. So to learn that the Twin Towers collapsing was what happened, these papers were flying a long way away from home. After that morning, I don't remember anything else. I'm still just hearing about other people's stories and finding out now that they lost someone. I can't even imagine what other people felt or witnessed.

I heard they're constructing six buildings around Ground Zero as the new World Trade Center now. I've never actually been down there myself but I will when they're done. 9/11 remember forever.

September 3, 2011

how my heart behaves

♫ by Feist

An entry I wrote the summer of third grade on our typewriter.. on looseleaf. It's interesting that I did not remember what happened when I bought the Gameboy Advance XP and how specific I was about things until now. I wrote funny..

♫ I Believe by Simian Mobile Disco
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September 1, 2011

magic works

I'm watching The Prestige

August 28, 2011

hurricane irene

Shit is getting real. I woke up to helicopters flying over my house today. All day I did nothing but prepare and watch Winter's Bone and help my mom put a gown together. It still just seems like an intense tropical storm though. We'll see the damage tomorrow morning. I was supposed to have a block party today :(

update: I went to bed at 3am. Woke up at 11am and it was bright and sunny so I was like "oh wow it was just a hurricane for only a few hours". Then went back to sleep and got up at 3pm to find everyone else in the house still sleeping. And now it's a tropical storm again, I heard Irene downgraded by the time she got to New York City. I like that it sounds like winter outside though, hearing the wind pound against my window and going through the trees. I hope they get the subway tracks cleared out by tomorrow, I want to go out!

August 27, 2011

in the clear

♫ Four In the Morning by Ivy

I've renovated the entire blog layout! Ya liiike?? There's even a "letters" page for feedback or comments or questions or answers or candy since I disable comments on my posts. Anyway, I hear Hurricane Irene is coming about this weekend and to be honest, my house isn't that prepared right now because we don't really believe how serious it is until it happens. My family is being way too chill about it. I live near the beach but I'm in Zone B so I guess that means I don't have to get evacuated. Our mayor is doing an awful job as well.. When the weather is actually seriously too risky to be in, he makes students go to school anyway. But now it's summer vacay and while an alleged "historical" hurricane is coming, he's stopping all the subways and buses and calling for a state of emergency so we can panic and panic and prepare and panic. A little girl cried today because she didn't know what would happen to her cat. I don't know how much this thing will damage the city but I'm just sayin.. it's the first shutdown for us and I'm just not taking it seriously I guess because this shit doesn't go down here.

As the amazingly sunny, perfect last day before the ugly weekend, a few of us got together at Liz's pool and tanned. It was a nice relaxing resort right before we should take cover. We're lying on the deck with tanning oil as the sun goes down while her neighbors film their property for house insurance and take their patio sets in. It was best for us not to freak out today. We couldn't really do anything about it either since our parents weren't even home yet. This past week my family invited relatives from Florida over which is pretty cool because I have never met some of these cousins. My dad caught a cicada and then it flew away and then my crazy cousin caught it again. This green flying grasshopper thing also got into my house..
I've never seen a grasshopper before. And last night a giant truck was sitting outside my house. Apparently my next door neighbors ordered another grand piano. I was waiting by the window to see what would come out of that dark corridor at the end of the truck. When they went in there with the flashlights, I was thinking they should have some animals too.

Anyway, it's actually pretty late now, twenty minutes to 5am. I have to go get groceries tomorrow to stock up for the hurricane and block my basement and tape the windows and bring all our plants in.. ugh mudda nachurrrr whyyyy

August 19, 2011

when your mind's made up

♫ by Glen Hansard & Markéta Irglová

This week was like a roller coaster. It was slow and then it caught up and then slow again and then hastened. All I remember from the ride were the peaks. I tried Netflix out and so far I love it. I made a rainbow cake 11 at night the past weekend in the slowest possible manner. It was devoured quickly the days afterward. The past lazy Sunday, I also remember watching Phineas + Ferb all afternoon and then went swimming and then watched more Phineas + Ferb until midnight. That show is really clever you know.. I can't think of more coincidences to happen in 20 minutes despite how annoying and repetitive the show is. I finished both seasons of Twin Peaks and watched the movie in the course of three days. I spent thirteen hours of my precious lifetime one day watching this amazing show, hooked from the first episode. I really wish they had made a third season because I have so many unanswered questions but twenty years late is pretty late.

My yearbook photos were taken this week too. I.. don't have anything to say about it until I see them. Oh on my way to the subway after that I also tripped in front of the fucking Starbucks where I have slipped and fell on my ass last winter. In front of all those people sitting by the window.. embarrassing. I have managed to get somewhere near the middle of my summer reading book. It is dreadfully boring but it picks up in some areas. I also realized I only read the book when I'm sitting on the train, I guess it's a better time passer but then I really have nothing else to do.

The photos I've scattered in this post are from today. I solely left the house three in the afternoon to go all the way to Pearl Paint and get modeling clay for this purpose: bracelets. I saw a diy on this last night and I had to do it. I'm not very motivated in taking photos this past week so I applied my hands on other things like this.. making awesome bracelets and sewing new pillowcases for the living room cushions (I've only completed 1, almost). I really love them and I'd like to sell them but I don't know if yall even like this kind of stuff so I'll just be making them for myself right now.

Last Friday I also bought my most wanted shoes of the season or year or I don't know but I just really couldn't afford them until now. I was actually considering saving up for these babies and if you know me, you know I am incapable of storing money somewhere for one thing. Well these Jeffrey Campbell Tardys were on sale and I went to Cobble Hill 10 in the morning and got them! I fell asleep at 4:30am the night before because I was honestly so excited and worried at the same time that they wouldn't be there. So these bitches are mine finally and I can't wait to wear them out soon. Anyway, it's 2am now and I promised my mom I'd go to bed early (lol).

Endless Rain by How to Dress Well

August 18, 2011


~mischelle's menagerie~
it looks like a cupcake bakery front.. i'll sell cupcakes in a couple of years

August 13, 2011

for sale!

Hey guys, I was finally able to publish my first photobook.. don't ask me why it took so long.
But please go and preview it, buy it, and support me!

I also finally just put up two pairs of my favorite shoes up for sale on my other blog. I am incredibly broke right now and I don't have a job so I'm going to give the internet a try on getting rid of my things.

Please check out the blog here at

August 10, 2011

I think I'll start painting again. Haven't done it in over a year.
Watch.. this is going to be the last time for months.

edit 8/12/11:
i finished it last night! hope yall like it